Related Items

"What are you talking about?" he said. This couldn't possibly be happening. It simply was not possible. All this time, he'd wanted to ignore the signs.

"I'm sorry," she replied, her tone of voice contrary and strong. She'd been planning this for quite a while. This had been going on for quite a while, and he knew it, he just didn't want to believe it.

"But... It's been... We've been together so... So long," he said, struggling to keep under control.

"I know. But... We just can't go on like this. Or, I just can't go on like this."

"What do you even mean?"

"You know what I mean... That... this just isn't going to work out."

"No, no, we've... it's been..."

He wanted to ignore the signs. He wanted his waves of denial back. It was so much easier, thinking that everything was fine, that they would last until they died.

"I know, I know, we've been together a long time. But... I just... This isn't sustainable for us anymore."

"What do you mean? Is there..." Could he say it? "Is there someone else?"

His wife sighed.

"No, no, there's no one else... Not like you think..."

"Well, what do I think then?" he said, unable to keep the anger and panic from his voice.

"You think... It was... I've never cheated on you."

"But you've thought of other people..."

This wasn't happening. It couldn't be. They'd been together for over ten years. This couldn't be happening... not now... He knew they'd been young when they'd gotten together, but...

"Yes, I have. I can't keep being in a relationship like this one."

All he could do was stare. That voice he'd once found so sweet, was now the knife twisting in his stomach.

"I... I mean, I love you. I always will. But I just can't do this anymore..."

He swallowed.

"Why didn't you... Why didn't you tell me earlier? Why did you take so long?" he said, his trembling fingers gripping a counter, fighting tears.

"I'm sorry," she replied softly. "I just... I knew you would be upset."

He wanted to scream. He wanted to shout at the top of his lungs, "Well of course I'm upset, it's been over ten years! What are you thinking? We've been married for more than a decade! Everything's been fine! I don't even know where this came from! How could you do this to us?!"

But he didn't. He gripped the counter harder.

"Well... Yeah, I am. But... If you just would have... If you would have said..." he choked out.

"Look..." his wife replied, placing her hand on his shoulder, as if it would comfort him now. "You know... things have been... difficult lately."

The pitying hand on his shoulder. He thought back to her previous relationships... so many boyfriends before him, she was already divorced once. Why would she do this? Everything had seemed great...

He shook off her hand.

"I know that they have. I know! But you could've at least told me sooner! I know you haven't been thinking this for just... for a few weeks or something. You wouldn't just... You wouldn't... I can't believe you, I really can't!" He said, launching off the counter and passed his wife.

He could hardly see her, as she stood there biting her lip.

"How could you do this? Why? Why are you doing this?!"

"Because! You know why! You know it hasn't been working out. How could you possibly delude yourself enough to think we were doing fine? I told you almost everything I could..."

He eyed the proverbial suitcase-in-her-hand. It was light blue, stuffed with all she thought she'd need.

"But the fact that you wanted to leave me for years never crossed your mind as something to tell me? You just decide to spring it on me?" With every word, he stepped closer to her. Her eyes widened, presumably with fear. But he couldn't stay angry... He couldn't... He stumbled back from her, as if he had been punched in the gut, taking his face in hands, as he stumbled to the floor. "I... I just don't understand... What did I do? What did I do to... What did I do to deserve... I... I'm sorry," he choked his words through uncontrollable sobs. Once more, he felt her hand on his shoulder, but didn't pull away.

"I'm sorry," she whispered to him. "You didn't do anything wrong... this... this isn't your fault."

She kissed him gently on the top of his head, before he heard her footsteps grow distant, her hand turn the front doorknob, the door shutting, car door opening... closing... the sound of her driving away.

And then it was over. But he would never let it be over. As he cried on the floor, he started to figure out ways to bring her back... he needed her... and he'd failed her.

A Poem

Always there
Full of wisdom
Full of everything
needed to be heard.
Always just
A phone call away.
Always
not too far away.
With the right words to say.
So gentle, kind,
Humor at hand.
Exactly who is needed.
Thank you, Lord,
For those you've placed within my life
For those
who are there.