Rescue (Chapter 2)

So, I'ma let you in on a story I heard. Once, there was a guy. The guy was pretty damn cool with himself, had a pretty decent life, wife, a kid, house, and a little spending money. But then this guy decided to go and screw it all up by screwing some other chick, and then promptly knocked her up. So this dickhead of a guy's wife left him, and now he has a little less spending money, but, he still got to marry the bitch he was screwing and had his precious demonspawn.

Misty Ann. Who the heck names their kid Misty Ann?!

I try to sneak my way into the house, by means of the back door. And Misty Ann, the Demonspawn greets me, immediately shouting,

"MOMMY! DADDY! Tristan's home!"

I really hate this kid. Demonspawn hugs me like I'm actually related to her. I pry her off and attempt to get to my room.

"Oh hey, Tristan! We were just wondering where you were..."

The b*tch stops me in the hall and scoops up her illegitimate demonspawn daughter. I ignore her and walk into my room, grateful for the lock on the door.

"Tristan home?" I hear the chromosome contributor say to D-Spawn's mother. I crash on my bed, my arms sprawled over the sides, head facing the wall, barely able to see it in my dim room. On the wall, there's a signed poster of some obscure "Christian metal" band that Chris gave me after a concert they played, an advertising poster of "The Dark Knight", and this smokin' poster with Megan Fox on it. I begin to realize that I am totally soaked from the rain outside. And then I realize I really don't care. I shut my eyes and hope that the pouring rain, roaring thunder, and blinding flashes of lightning are capable of lulling me to sleep.

Bruce Wayne is getting a call from the Joker, telling him the locations of Harvey Dent and Rachel, his girlfriend. They're both about to get their heads blown off. Batman takes off and heads in the direction of Harvey. Weird thing is, Batman isn't Batman. It's me. And Harvey isn't Harvey. He's some Dad-aged man, that I feel an instant resentment toward the moment I find him.

I hear a shriek from far away, where a girl who isn't Rachel, dies in a burning warehouse. I don't want to save the man I'm pulling out, and suddenly, I've dropped him, no, thrown him, into his burning warehouse.

And I'm on fire, my face burning like when Two-Face was made, but I can't feel it. I don't die, unlike Not-Rachel, and the Not-Harvey, who are incredibly dead. Then I hear the echoes of Not-Rachel's scream, and I feel the flames suddenly begin to sting, then escalate into agonizing pain.

I awaken in the dark. Usually, my dreams aren't nearly this morbid. Especially after I've just been high and mildly intoxicated. I shake my groggy head and glance at the digital clock. 12:30. I've been asleep for five and a half hours, and I have a killer headache. I flop my head back down on the pillow. Ugh.

I want to go back to sleep, but it's not working very well. I decide to get something to eat. I get off my bed and feel my way to the door. It's ridiculously dark in here. Down the hall, I hear the TV on, some obnoxious kid's show. Why are those on at this hour?! I roll my eyes and trudge into the kitchen. I open the fridge, the light blinding, and pull out a slice of pizza. I commence to eating it, and pass by the living room. The spawn sits on the couch, with half a package of Oreo's and a huge glass of chocolate milk with one of those obnoxious striped straws in it, watching Nick Jr. She stops mid-bite on another one of the cookies and looks over at me.

She's in freaking kindergarten, and she's up late sneaking cookies. Her mom buys her dresses all the time and gives her whatever she wants. She's a brat and she'll grow increasingly worse with age.

"H-Hi Tristan," she says, nervously. "The storm was scary so I wanted to watch TV."

That's EXACTLY what I would do! Not. Demonspawn never makes sense. Her existence does not make sense to me, especially not right now.

"Yeah, whatever, go to bed or I'll tell your bit_, er, mom that you were up past your bedtime," I say, yawning, then pad down the hall back to my room. I finish the rest of my pizza and lean back on my bed, staring at the ceiling.

I hear D-Spawn tread downstairs. They seriously need to get that girl on a program or something. I get underneath a blanket and pull it over my head. Nausea, headaches, I hate my life, dang, what I would do to just fall asleep... maybe have another freaking weird Batman dream where I actually get the girl out of the burning building. Except Rachel would definitely be played by Megan Fox... or maybe Britney Alexander.

Who the hell was the girl in my dream anyway? I rack my brain for the answer, and eventually, sleep washes over me again.